Box Room

Summary of the poem:

• "Box Room" by Liz Lochhead explores issues of love, family, relationships, the past, atmosphere, womanhood, and place.
• It tells the story of a girl visiting her boyfriend's childhood home and staying in his old room (the box room) for the weekend.
• The poem is divided into two stanzas, with a shift in tone and attitude between them.
• In the first stanza, the speaker displays a defiant and assertive attitude when dealing with the disapproving mother.
• The second stanza shows the speaker's doubts and uncertainty about her relationship as she contemplates the past and its impact.

The inspiration for the poem:

• The inspiration for the poem is drawn from the experience of a young woman visiting her boyfriend's childhood home and encountering tension and competition with the boyfriend's mother.
• The poem reflects the conflict between the girlfriend and the mother, highlighting the struggle for a place in the boyfriend's affections.
• It explores the impact of discovering the boyfriend's past and the doubts it raises about the relationship's future.

Form of the poem:

• The poem is structured with two stanzas, each consisting of nine pairs of rhyming couplets, creating a strong rhythm.
• The first stanza exhibits a sarcastic and defiant tone, while the second stanza shifts to one of uncertainty, reflecting the young woman's evolving emotions.
• Enjambment is used to emphasize words like "pathetic" and "shrine," contributing to the tone and meaning of the poem.

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Poetry

Explanation of each stanza:

Stanza 1:

In the first stanza of 'Box Room,' the speaker describes her arrival at her boyfriend's childhood home. She recounts her interaction with the boyfriend's mother, where there is an underlying tension and competition between the two women. The mother's words and actions suggest disapproval of the girlfriend, while the girlfriend responds with defiance and a readiness to compete for her boyfriend's affections. The tone in this stanza is sarcastic and assertive.

Stanza 2:

The second stanza of the poem reflects the girlfriend's thoughts and emotions during her stay in the "box room." She describes the room itself and the various objects in it that relate to her boyfriend's past. As she contemplates these items, doubts about her relationship begin to emerge. She questions whether she truly knows her boyfriend and worries about the future of their relationship. The room's atmosphere contributes to her growing sense of uncertainty and insecurity. The tone shifts from defiance to doubt, highlighting the impact of discovering her boyfriend's past on her emotions and the relationship's future.

Themes:

Female Rivalry:

• The mother and girlfriend engage in a silent power struggle, displaying sarcasm and contempt towards each other.
• The mother's actions and words convey her disapproval of the girlfriend, while the girlfriend adopts a defiant attitude, ready to compete for her boyfriend's affection.

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Poetry

Doubt and Uncertainty in Relationships:

• The girlfriend's confidence in her relationship diminishes as she discovers her boyfriend's childhood mementos and realises her transient status in his life.
• The poem explores how doubt and uncertainty can disrupt a romantic relationship and lead to insecurity.

Imagery:

The Egg Collection:

• The boyfriend's childhood egg collection symbolises not only a hobby but also past relationships.
• It raises questions about the impact of previous girlfriends and the boyfriend's commitment to starting a family with the current girlfriend.

The Box Room:

• The box room serves as a physical space that reflects the mother's attachment to her son's past.
• It symbolises the girlfriend's sense of entrapment and coldness, both in the room and in her relationship.

Style Techniques:

Repetition:

• The repetition of the phrase "Peace to unpack" in the second stanza highlights the shift in the speaker's attitude from assertiveness to doubt and trouble.

Personification:

• Fear is personified as an intrusive presence, keeping the speaker awake, emphasizing the impact of her doubts on her emotions.

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Poetry

Language Techniques:

Metaphor:

• The egg collection is metaphorically linked to relationships, suggesting that it may symbolize the boyfriend's past romantic involvements.
• The word "nest" in this context implies the security of a loving family home.

Oxymoron:

• The phrase "deceptive mildness" refers to the initial appearance of warmth and comfort in the room and the relationship but reveals their underlying coldness and impermanence.

The poem conveys the complex interplay between past and present, as well as the challenges and insecurities that can arise within relationships, making it a thought-provoking exploration of love, identity, and memory.

Personal Reflection

1. How does the poem's exploration of female rivalry and competition make you reflect on societal expectations and stereotypes related to women's roles in relationships and families?

2. What emotions does the poem's shift from defiance to doubt evoke, and how does it reflect the complex dynamics of past and present in relationships?

3. In what ways does the poem challenge your perspective on the significance of memories, possessions, and the influence of the past on the present?