Paper 2 Question 5: Speech Model Answer (AQA GCSE English Language): Model Answers

40/40 Answer

The Problem of Poverty

What if I told you that homeless people still deserve more? What would you say? How would you respond? There has been a shocking increase in the number of people struggling to survive in this country. We should be outraged! Charities alone are no longer enough; we need more—more funding, more care, more love for our society, especially for those less fortunate than ourselves. Here's why.

Did you know that only one in two homeless people have the opportunity to find work? This is absurd! The government is failing to provide adequate support for the unemployed, and as a result, many end up homeless. In our age of technological advancements, access to the internet is crucial. It opens doors to education, job opportunities, and vital resources. Yet, many homeless individuals are denied this basic necessity.

However, some argue that the high demand for technology means there isn't enough to go around. Yes, I understand that. But we must not forget that the reason these people are suffering is because we, as a nation, as a community, as a family, have the power to give them time and trust. By engaging with them, offering potential job leads, and providing support, we can make a real difference.

Now let's talk about charities. Before you react, hear me out! Charities do incredible work, supporting thousands, even millions, of people globally. Yet, they lack the authority and resources of the government. Take C.A.R.E., for example. This world-renowned organisation aids victims of natural disasters but can only do so much. The government, with its international reach, strong funding, and, most importantly, power, can significantly reduce poverty rates in the UK. Although they have demanding schedules, collaboration between the government and specialised charities can achieve the impossible. Together, they can provide the necessary aid more quickly and effectively than ever before.

Furthermore, there are homes available—new buildings, flats, and apartments are continuously being constructed. The government funds many of these projects and therefore has control over them. Imagine if they housed at least 25% of the homeless population in London. It would be a significant start. This movement could act as a catalyst, inspiring similar initiatives yearly. By 2080, 75% of the homeless could have homes. But we do not have the luxury of time. We must act now. In the meantime, I urge you to donate to charities supporting the poor. This will allow them to stay in hostels, providing temporary shelter and safety.

In conclusion, it is imperative for the government to initiate these changes. Those suffering from unemployment will benefit, those relying on charities will benefit, and the economy will benefit in the long run as more people find employment. So, I implore you, the population, the country, the people, let us raise our voices. Only then will the government listen to our cries.

Feedback:

Assessment Objective	Criteria	Feedback	Mark
AO5	Content and Organisation		24/24
	Communicates effectively and imaginatively	The introduction is engaging and hooks the reader immediately. The response effectively addresses multiple relevant arguments, supporting them with clear evidence and examples. Each paragraph is well-developed and thorough.
	Clear, logical structure	The essay follows a logical structure with smooth transitions between paragraphs. Each paragraph focuses on a specific aspect of the argument, enhancing clarity and persuasiveness.
	Wide range of cohesive devices	The use of cohesive devices such as linking words, varied sentence structures, and rhetorical questions maintains reader engagement and ensures the text flows well.
	Sophisticated use of vocabulary	The vocabulary is advanced and precise, demonstrating a high level of language proficiency.
	Varied and effective use of sentence structures	The response uses a variety of sentence lengths and structures effectively, enhancing readability and maintaining the reader's interest.
	Effectively adapted tone and register for purpose/audience	The formal and respectful tone is appropriate for the topic, and the writer's passion and urgency are conveyed convincingly.
	Use of structural features to organise writing	The progression of ideas is clear and logical, with each section building on the previous one to strengthen the overall argument.
AO6	Technical Accuracy		16/16
	High level of accuracy in spelling, punctuation, grammar	Spelling, punctuation, and grammar are consistently accurate. The effective use of punctuation (em dashes, exclamation marks, semicolons) adds emphasis and clarity.
	Wide range of sentence structures used appropriately	The response demonstrates control of complex grammatical structures and uses a wide range of sentence types appropriately.
	Consistent use of Standard English	The use of Standard English is consistent and appropriate throughout the response.
Overall Mark			40/40