Stitch (Scottish Highers English): Revision Notes
Stitch
Overview
"Stitch" by Imtiaz Dharker explores a childhood memory that reveals the complex relationship between a daughter and her mother. The poem centres on two cardigans belonging to the speaker and her friend Cathy. Cathy owns a blue, machine-made cardigan, whilst the speaker's mother knits a handmade red version, modelled on Cathy's. This red cardigan becomes a powerful symbol throughout the poem. It represents the relationship between mother and daughter: striking, unique, and full of love, but also complicated by the mother's need to control and dominate her child's life.
The central symbol of the poem is the red cardigan, which functions as a metaphor for the entire mother-daughter relationship. Just as the cardigan is handmade, unique, and impossible to ignore, so too is the relationship intense, unconventional, and overwhelming.
The poem traces the mother's determined process of creating the cardigan, from measuring and shopping to the actual knitting. As the narrative unfolds, the cardigan becomes more than just clothing. It embodies the mother's intense emotional investment in her daughter and her desire to shape her child's future. The final stanza jumps forward in time to when the speaker leaves home as an adult, revealing the lasting impact of this intense maternal relationship.
Form and structure
The poem consists of nine stanzas, each containing three lines. This consistent structure provides a framework for the narrative whilst allowing flexibility in how the story unfolds. There is no regular rhyme scheme, which gives the poem a natural, conversational quality that mirrors the flow of memory.
The rhythm changes throughout the poem, sometimes speeding up and sometimes slowing down. These variations in pace serve multiple purposes. At times, the shifting rhythm suggests the changing tempo of knitting needles working through different stages of the process. The rhythm also captures the mother's domineering energy as she drives the project forward with determination. This varying pace creates a contrast between the relationships of the two daughters with their mothers: Cathy's calm, controlled relationship versus the speaker's intense, overwhelming one.
The poem is written entirely in the present tense, which creates an immediate, vivid quality. Using the present tense plunges the reader directly into the speaker's memory, making the past feel alive and current. This choice makes the experience more immediate and suggests that these childhood events continue to affect the speaker in the present day.
Colour symbolism
Dharker uses colour symbolism throughout the poem to represent different emotional states and types of relationships. This technique allows the poet to convey complex feelings through simple visual imagery.
Blue represents feelings that are calm, controlled and conventional. Cathy's "ice blue cardigan" suggests an emotional landscape that is cool, predictable and socially acceptable. The word "ice" emphasises the coldness and lack of passion in this representation.
Red symbolises strong, fiery and overflowing emotion. The speaker's red cardigan embodies passionate feelings that cannot be contained or controlled. Red suggests intensity, heat and sometimes overwhelming force.
This colour choice reflects the speaker's mother's approach to both knitting and parenting: passionate, all-consuming and impossible to ignore.
Detailed analysis
Stanza 1
The opening stanza immediately establishes a contrast between two different approaches to the mother-daughter relationship. This comparison sets up the central tension that runs throughout the entire poem.
Cathy's mother calls her daughter "her sweet heart". This is a conventional, familiar term of endearment widely used in British culture. The phrase suggests a relationship that is under control, appropriate and comfortable. The heart functions as a clear, uncomplicated symbol of love in Western culture. There is nothing shocking or unusual about this expression; it represents a straightforward, socially acceptable form of maternal affection.
The speaker's mother, however, calls her "a piece of her liver". This phrase is shockingly vivid and perhaps more authentic in expressing the depth of maternal feeling. The comparison is visceral, relating to the internal organs of the body, and suggests a love that is physical and possessive. The mother sees her daughter as literally part of her own body, something she cannot separate from herself.
This image dates back to ancient Middle Eastern cultures, where the liver was understood as the seat of love and other deep emotions. The comparison of heart and liver reflects a cultural difference between the speaker's family background and Cathy's more conventional British upbringing. The liver image suggests something more raw, more intensely felt, and more difficult to control than the simple heart symbol.
Stanzas 2-6
This extended section traces the mother's determined process of recreating Cathy's cardigan for her own daughter. The narrative builds momentum as the mother moves from observation to action with increasing intensity.
The section opens with a single, isolated sentence: "Cathy has an ice blue cardigan." The words "ice blue" carry multiple associations. They sound cold, suggesting emotional distance and control. The colour evokes something frozen, unchanging and perfectly formed. Everything about Cathy's cardigan is controlled, tidy and machine-made. This single sentence stands alone, reflecting the simple, uncomplicated nature of Cathy's possession.
This simplicity contrasts sharply with everything that follows. The rest of this section sees emotions and energy spilling over, shown through enjambment that carries thoughts across stanza breaks without pause. Where Cathy's cardigan requires only one calm sentence, the speaker's cardigan demands multiple stanzas of feverish activity.
Analysing Language and Technique:
The speaker's mother "holds Cathy still", physically imposing herself on the other child. There is a sense of the mother exerting control, taking charge of the situation. She is not asking permission; she is taking what she needs.
The alliteration in "studies the stitches" emphasises her intense focus and determination. The repeated 's' sounds stress the seriousness of her concentration. She can absorb the entire pattern simply by staring at it, such is the force of her will.
The phrase "eyes screwed up" suggests both physical effort and complete absorption in her task. The mother is channelling all her energy into understanding this pattern so she can recreate it.
The mother then "measures me" and "marches me" to the shops. The alliteration and repetition of the 'm' sound emphasises the sudden shift from studying to action. There is a military quality to "marches", suggesting discipline and command. The repetition of "me" makes clear that the daughter is being dominated, directed and controlled by the mother. The mother is not consulting her daughter about what she wants; she is taking charge of the situation entirely.
The mother uses the "span of her hand" to measure, relying on her own body rather than calculations, patterns or measuring tape. Just as she earlier compared her daughter to "a piece of my liver", connecting them through physical bodies, here again the two are linked through the mother's physical presence. The mother is literally imprinting herself onto her daughter through this hand-measuring process.
They travel "over the bridge to Argyll Street", which provides specific local detail, placing them in a real location in Glasgow. However, the image of crossing a bridge carries symbolic weight. Bridges connect different places; they allow movement from one location to another. Here, the bridge could represent crossing from one culture to another. The speaker and her mother might be crossing from the southside of Glasgow, which is home to Pakistani communities, to the conventional Scottish city centre.
They go to buy "wool and needles", making clear that the mother is starting from scratch. She is not adapting something she already owns; she is creating something entirely new through her own labour and determination. This contrasts with Cathy's machine-made cardigan, which was simply purchased, complete and perfect.
The mother's knitting is described as "fierce". This word suggests power, intensity and barely controlled energy. Even when sitting down to knit, she is bristling with determination. The sense throughout this section is of the mother swooping into action and bringing the cardigan into existence through the sheer force of her personality and will. She does not allow anything to stand in her way.
In stanza 5, the actual knitting process is captured through a rhythm that breaks into small, fragmented phrases: "slips one, purls one, / unravels, starts again,". These are technical knitting terms that most readers will recognise even if they do not knit themselves. The broken rhythm suggests someone who is not an expert but is finding her way through trial and error. The mother makes mistakes ("unravels") but does not give up; she begins again with renewed determination.
The onomatopoeia and alliteration in "needles clicking, clacking" recreates the actual sound of knitting needles working rapidly together. The hard 'c' and 'k' sounds suggest speed and momentum. The mother achieves mastery through the sheer force of her will and her impatience to make this cardigan a reality. She will not be defeated by lack of skill; she will force herself to succeed.
Stanza 6 makes explicit what has been implicit throughout this section: the knitting is a metaphor for something larger. The phrase "shape of the life" suggests that just as the mother is shaping the cardigan with her needles and wool, she is also trying to construct and control her daughter's future.
The word "plotting" carries dark connotations. We speak of villains plotting evil schemes; the word suggests secret plans and potentially harmful intentions. Whilst the mother may believe she is helping her daughter, the word choice reveals something more sinister about her need to control.
The phrase "knitting herself into me" makes the metaphor even more explicit. The mother is not simply making a cardigan for her daughter to wear; she is trying to ensure that she herself becomes part of her daughter's very being, something the daughter cannot escape from. This links back to the opening stanza's image of the daughter as "a piece of her liver". The mother sees no separation between herself and her child; she wants to remain physically and emotionally embedded in her daughter's life forever.
Stanzas 7-8
These two stanzas present the finished cardigan and explore what it reveals about the mother and the mother-daughter relationship.
The single word "Done" carries a sense of finality and achievement. After all the energy, determination and effort, the task is complete. The mother has succeeded in her goal. She has made "a perfect copy of Cathy's" cardigan. The alliteration of "cardigan…copy…Cathy's" holds the description together with a pleasing pattern of repeated sounds. The language here sounds calmer and more controlled than the feverish energy of the previous stanzas, suggesting satisfaction and accomplishment.
However, this moment of calm is immediately disrupted by the dramatic two-word ending: "but red". This abrupt phrase shatters any sense of peace or conventionality. The mother may have copied the shape and pattern, but she has chosen a completely different colour. Red immediately suggests powerful and possibly aggressive feelings being unleashed. Where Cathy's blue cardigan was cool, calm and controlled, this red version burns with intensity.
The contrast between the two cardigans is further developed. Cathy's is "machine-made", suggesting perfection, uniformity and lack of human involvement. The speaker's cardigan is "worked by hand", emphasising the human labour, imperfection and personal investment involved in its creation. The edges of the handmade cardigan are irregular; they "wriggle". This verb suggests something alive and moving, almost as if the mother has created something with its own energy and life force.
This description links back to the extended metaphor of the mother "knitting herself into me". The wriggling edges suggest the mother's life and energy are present in the cardigan itself. The mother is always moving, always active, possibly uncomfortably so. Her presence is a constant in the cardigan and, by extension, in the speaker's life. The daughter cannot simply put on a neutral piece of clothing; she must carry her mother's intense personality with her wherever she goes.
Stanza 9
The final stanza jumps forward in time, showing the long-term consequences of the intense mother-daughter relationship established in childhood.
The stanza opens with what seems like a conventional scene: "when I leave, my mother cries / on the phone". Adult children leaving home is a normal life transition, and mothers often feel sad about this change. However, inversion and enjambment place emphasis on the mother and her reaction. Even though it is the speaker who has taken action and made a decision about her own life, the mother remains the focus of attention. She is such a powerful personality that she dominates the poem even when discussing the daughter's independence.
Up to this point in the poem, the speaker and mother have inhabited the same physical space: measuring, shopping, watching the knitting process unfold. Now they are separated, connected only by a phone call. This physical distance represents the emotional separation the speaker has fought to achieve.
Understanding Manipulation:
The mother's words reveal her inability to accept this necessary change: she "says her liver / has been torn apart." This violent image conveys raw, visceral pain. The mother is returning to the metaphor from the opening stanza, where she called her daughter "a piece of her liver". Now that the daughter has left, the mother experiences this as a physical tearing, as if part of her own body has been violently removed.
However, the mother's focus remains on her own pain rather than her daughter's growth or happiness. The mother is not celebrating her daughter's independence or new life; she is dwelling on her own suffering. This is also a manipulative comment, designed to make the daughter feel guilty.
The mother is ensuring that her daughter knows exactly how much pain she has caused by choosing to live her own life. The speaker cannot simply leave and move on; she must carry the burden of her mother's suffering with her.
Throughout the poem, the mother's actions have dominated every moment. She has controlled the measuring, the shopping, the knitting and, by extension, her daughter's childhood. Now, when faced with something she cannot control – her adult daughter's decision to leave – the mother is overwhelmed. She cannot accept change when it is imposed on her by someone else, even when that change is natural and necessary for her daughter's development.
Key themes
Powerful emotions and complex relationships
The presence of the speaker's mother dominates every aspect of this poem, just as she dominated her child's life. Her energy and force of will are present in every stanza, from the initial comparison of her daughter to "a piece of her liver" through the fierce determination with which she creates the cardigan. The mother is a powerful personality who brings tremendous energy to everything she does, whether knitting or parenting.
However, this energy has a darker side. The mother's determination to make her daughter a cardigan reflects a more troubling desire to curate and control her child's entire life. The metaphor of "plotting" the "shape of the life" for her daughter reveals that the mother does not see her child as a separate person with her own desires and future. Instead, she sees her daughter as an extension of herself, someone whose life should be shaped according to the mother's vision.
The relationship between mother and daughter appears less conflicted during childhood, when the speaker is too young to resist her mother's control. The memory of being measured and watching the cardigan being created does not seem entirely negative. There is something impressive about the mother's determination and skill, and the daughter may have felt some pride in having a unique, handmade cardigan.
However, achieving a positive adult relationship appears impossible. The mother cannot accept her daughter's independence or allow her to make her own choices. When the daughter finally leaves home, the mother's response is devastating. Rather than feeling proud of her daughter's growth or accepting that children must eventually live their own lives, the mother focuses entirely on her own suffering. She makes clear that she experiences her daughter's departure as a terrible betrayal and a physical injury. This manipulative response suggests that the relationship cannot evolve into a healthy adult connection because the mother refuses to see her daughter as a separate person with her own needs and rights.
Change and moving on
The poem presents change in complex and contradictory ways. The mother herself embodies change and transformation: her whole approach to both knitting and parenting seems to be about taking life on, confronting challenges and making change happen through force of will. She sees Cathy's cardigan, immediately decides to create her own version, and through sheer determination makes this happen despite having no pattern and needing to learn as she goes. This is someone who does not passively accept circumstances but actively shapes the world around her.
However, the mother proves completely unable to cope when change is imposed on her rather than chosen by her. When her daughter makes the decision to leave home and live independently, the mother cannot accept this natural transition. She experiences it as a traumatic loss rather than as a positive development in her daughter's life. The mother can only handle change when she controls it; she cannot accept change that comes from others, even when that change is necessary and healthy.
For the speaker, leaving home represents essential change. The poem makes clear through its imagery and metaphors that the mother has attempted to control every aspect of her daughter's life, from the literal measuring of her body to the metaphorical plotting of her future. The speaker is aware of her need to escape from this overwhelming maternal presence. Change becomes a matter of survival and personal development. The speaker must move on to establish her own identity and live her own life, separate from her mother's dominating personality.
The poem suggests that change is sometimes essential for an individual to survive and flourish, but it acknowledges that such necessary change creates genuine suffering for those who cannot accept it. The mother's pain is real, even if her response is manipulative and unhealthy. The poem does not offer easy answers about how to resolve this conflict between one person's need for independence and another person's inability to let go.
Childhood and memories
The speaker's memory of watching her mother knit a cardigan demonstrates how seemingly simple childhood experiences can reveal complex truths about relationships and family dynamics. The vividly recalled details – being held still and measured, the journey over the bridge to Argyll Street, watching the needles clicking and clacking – show how deeply this experience impressed itself on the speaker's mind. These are not vague, general memories but precise, sensory recollections that remain sharp and clear.
The memory appears to be triggered by something specific (perhaps seeing the cardigan again, or perhaps just thinking about her mother), and the use of present tense throughout the poem suggests that these past events continue to feel immediate and relevant. The speaker is not simply recalling something that happened long ago; she is re-experiencing it with full emotional force. This indicates that childhood experiences continue to shape us throughout our lives, even when we become adults and physically separate from our families.
The apparently simple set of actions – measuring, shopping, knitting – gradually reveals deeper complexities about the mother's personality and the nature of their relationship. What might have seemed at the time like a loving gesture (making a special handmade cardigan for her daughter) is revealed through adult reflection to have darker undertones. The mother was not simply making clothing; she was asserting control, imposing her will and attempting to knit herself into her daughter's very being.
The speaker was dominated as a child, unable to resist her mother's powerful personality or question her mother's choices. As an adult, she has had to make the painful decision to tear herself away from her mother in order to live her own life. The childhood memory takes on new meaning when viewed through the lens of adult experience. What might once have seemed like devotion and love is now understood to include elements of control, manipulation and an unhealthy inability to see the daughter as a separate person.
Comparison with other poems by Imtiaz Dharker
Both "Stitch" and "The Knot" explore childhood memories that reveal complex truths about family relationships. In "Stitch", the mother's act of knitting the cardigan is not simply about creating something useful or beautiful for her child. The poem makes explicit that the knitting reflects the mother's deeper desire to dominate her child's life and control "the shape of the life she is plotting for me". Similarly, in "The Knot", the mother's preparation of picnic food initially appears to reflect her important nurturing role within the family. However, as the poem develops, the mother's desire to maintain control becomes destructive to the harmony of family life. Both poems reveal how maternal care can shade into domination and how loving gestures can contain elements of control.
The poems "Bairn" and "Bloom" also explore the power of maternal love but present this experience in a much more positive light. In "Bairn", the speaker's entire experience of life is transformed by the overwhelming love they feel for their baby. The world looks different; priorities shift completely. In "Bloom", the speaker experiences a sudden, powerful realisation of just how special their baby is, and this recognition transforms their understanding of themselves and their role. Both poems present parental love as transformative in positive ways. The parents in these poems are changed by love rather than attempting to change and control their children. This provides a sharp contrast to the relationship depicted in "Stitch", where the mother's love is possessive and controlling rather than liberating and joyful.
"Letters to Glasgow" offers another perspective on human connection and relationships, this time focused on an older woman who has lost her partner. The woman keeps her relationship alive through her memories and photographs, finding comfort in this connection even though her partner has died. Her life continues; she moves forward despite her loss. She does not become trapped by grief or resentment.
This contrasts strongly with the mother in "Stitch", who focuses obsessively on the negative aspects of change. The mother in "Stitch" dwells on her own pain and loss rather than celebrating the positive growth and development in her daughter's life. She cannot move forward or accept that change is a natural part of relationships.
In a broader sense, "Send this too" presents a positive vision of accepting or even embracing reality and change, though in this case the focus is on a city rather than a person. The poem celebrates transformation and evolution rather than mourning what has been lost. This acceptance of change stands in direct opposition to the mother in "Stitch", who attempts to control her daughter's life, prevent unwelcome changes and manipulate her daughter through expressions of suffering when she cannot maintain control.
Key Points to Remember:
- The red cardigan symbolises the intense, complicated relationship between mother and daughter – handmade and unique but also controlling and inescapable
- Colour symbolism runs throughout: blue represents calm and conventional feelings, whilst red represents powerful, overflowing emotion
- The mother's fierce determination in knitting is a metaphor for how she tries to "plot" and control her daughter's entire life, "knitting herself into me"
- The comparison between "her sweet heart" and "a piece of her liver" reveals cultural differences and shows the visceral, possessive nature of the mother's love
- The poem explores how childhood experiences shape us and how necessary change (like leaving home) can cause pain even when it is essential for growth and independence